Parlor Pizz’eh’

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I recently made an executive decision with my strategies team, (Sully) to eliminate negative restaurant reviews from my blog. I think it creates bad energy and nobody needs that. That said, I have to tell you about my experience at Parlor Pizza Bar on Saturday night.

Picture this: Perfect weather. Rooftop bar. Downstairs patio with picnic tables. Loud inside bar with more tables. Rosé flowing like water. Girls in crop tops that read: #roséallday. Girls in other variations of crop tops taking selfies with their rosé and instagramming their selfie with the hashtag, you guessed it, roséallday. So, there’s that.

Then there is my group of six, who I will coin, ‘The Very Hungry Caterpillars’. We’re over 25. Our clothes actually cover our extremities. We’re having drinks, but we have them with the end goal of food in mind. Suddenly, except not suddenly at all, our 45 minute wait for the patio turns into a 2 hour wait for inside. Not happy. We get our food quickly, likely because we pulled our waitress out of the bathroom so she would take our order.

The pizza is good. The salads are good. The calamari is good. Nothing is great. I am not denying that we eat the meal like we are headed straight to the chair, but, on a scale of 1 to eh, it’s an eh.

That rooftop bar though, it is pretty fantastic. Especially when the reality is that our outdoor days are numbered.

So, here’s the bottom line: Enjoy the roof, but have a brisket sandwich beforehand, preferably from Green Street Smoked Meats.